Challenges can feel scary because they throw a wrench in our plans and test us on what we think we know (are you really happy in your relationship? can you really stay in your comfort zone forever? is being the big fish in a pond that you don't like really better than being a small fish in a brand new pond?).
It breaks down the current systems in which you work and pushes you to try on new perspectives. A new way of living - a new way of being in the world.
One of the scariest parts of a challenge - whether it be a breakup, leaping for a dream, or say a pandemic like Covid-19 (which is what 2020 is going to be known in history for)…, is the uncertainty. You really don’t know what’s going to happen. Will you be alone forever? Will you fail miserably and lose everything? Will the world be the same after this?
What if you could reduce the level of anxiety and number of sleepless nights caused by uncertainty?
Actually, you can! There’s relief and validation when you can understand what you’re going through.
In this episode, I share with you the Change Cycle - a process created by life coach and author, Martha Beck. It depicts the phases that we go through for every major change. Even a pandemic.
When you realize that feeling confused and formless is just part of a bigger picture you get a bit of relief. And when you know that each phase is part of a transformation that’s taking place within you, it doesn’t seem so hard. You know that there’s an end and not only that, you can take relevant action to move through each part with more ease.
This pandemic of Covid-19 is uncharted territory but the process is the same. Knowing this process will help you navigate the odd new terrain of the pandemic as well as any other challenging times that you may come across in your life.
I’ll go into more depth and give you useful for each phase over the next few Bite Sized episodes.
Topic Summary:
- Phases of The Change Cycle:
Breakdown of something in your life
Imagining a new way of being
Creating a new life and new identity
Living, transformed, in a way that you could’ve never imagined as your old self
Resources:
Referenced in this episode:
Episode 104: Using Story to Heal + Transform Your Life with Anjanette Fennell
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Key Nuggets:
The Change Cycle, created by life coach and author Martha Beck, depicts the process that we go through for every major life change.
4 phases, split into internal world and external world.
The analogy of a caterpillar turning into a butterfly is used to understand it.
Square 1: Death & Rebirth
Butterfly: The caterpillar builds it’s cocoon and deconstructs every part of itself into caterpillar soup.
You: Something change in your life and it deconstructs your system of being in this world. You no longer are who you were but you don’t know who you are yet.
Square 2: Dreaming & Scheming
Butterfly: The cells that hold the blueprint of a butterfly gets activated and the caterpillar soup begins to build itself back up, cell by cell, into a butterfly.
You: One day, a new possibility dawns on you. Something that you never thought of before - a new way of being.
Square 3: Hero’s Saga
Butterfly: Now the butterfly is fully formed in the cocoon. It needs to use all it’s strength to bust out of the cocoon and into the world.
You: You’re ready to take action to bring your vision to life! You apply for new jobs or maybe a business license. Or maybe you take a course on photography.
Square 4: The Promise Land
Butterfly: Out of the cocoon and with its wings dried, it flies out into the world, experiencing it from a whole new perspective.
You: You’ve transformed. You feel settled in your new identity and this new you feels normal. A little stronger and wiser than your “caterpillar” self.